There is a Jewish proverb that states: “Loneliness breaks the spirit.” During an ice breaker game in my overly opinionated public speaking class the question was “what is your fear”? Being one of the first to answer, telling my ever present fear of my two shoe racks getting stolen it didn’t take long for the rest of the class to answer the question. To my amazement many beautiful, young, intelligent women answered with a quiet reply… “Being alone for the rest of my life.”
Why was this a fear at a young age? Walking the short distance to my car, I kept hearing the always annoying complaints from young women about boyfriends that are cheating, lying, blah blah blah. I always thought that douche bag guys, like John, were made from their own ego, however I am beginning to realize that us as women (not all women of course!) Are so afraid of being alone that we will stick with guys that use and abuse us. It is a sad situation that beautiful young women all over are being mistreated and disrespected yet never will do anything about it; one of my very best girlfriends has been in a relationship with a man for years that she doesn’t even like. He calls her names, doesn’t show any respect, and above all else they aren’t really in love. Time after time I have heard her say that this was the day she would finally break up with him, however that day has yet to come. She enjoys the idea of her boyfriend and the relationship that comes with it, she feels secure that she is not alone, and in an odd way this makes her feel complete.
Maybe when destroying a man, we have to show that we can live without them, that we are young and very independent women. On the first date it is important that you pick the place, that you don’t let them pick you up, but meet them there. When John texted me I didn’t agree to go out with him right away, actually I ditched him on the first date and then called to tell him where to meet me and the time… but remember to be at least ten minutes late.
Ladies don’t be afraid to be alone, don’t let this loneliness break your spirit, in the end you will be the one who finds a wonderful man and will be in true love with him. Whatever happens remember love yourself first and then it will be easy for someone to love you.